How to Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety

Selma Holley
August 7, 2020 0 Comment

Many people across the world have problems with sexual anxiety. If you are wondering what it is and how to overcome it, you’re in the right place. Here, we will cover everything you need to know about this problem.

What Is Sexual Performance Anxiety?

Everyone knows that sex should be enjoyable and beautiful. However, there are many men out there with sexual anxiety. As you might know, sex is a lot more than just physical experience, and your emotions will play an essential role in the act. As a result, some people might feel that their performance will not be up to level.

Consequently, men with sexual anxiety may have trouble getting and keeping an erection. People experiencing this sexual problem won’t be able to satisfy their partners. While the whole issue might seem similar to erectile dysfunction, the reality is different.

Erectile dysfunction is a medical condition where a person cannot maintain an erection for various reasons. It might be due to their age, medications they are using, heart disease, high cholesterol or blood pressure, obesity, and many others. Sexual anxiety, on the other hand, is more similar to stress. The person will worry too much about things that they won’t focus on enjoying themselves and their partner.

Another significant difference between erectile dysfunction and sexual anxiety is that the latter can affect both men and women regardless of age. For some, this problem might be only temporary and won’t have as much of an impact as others might experience. Those who keep having the same problem will feel it affect other aspects of their lives, and it can significantly increase stress and anxiety in general.

Women will experience this issue and have trouble getting aroused or having orgasms. For men, the anxiety manifests in the form of erectile problems. The person with sexual anxiety will have difficulty having or keeping an erection, or they might have premature ejaculation problems.

What Are the Causes?

There are several reasons why someone might experience sexual anxiety. The most common issue is a person’s desire to please their partner. While this is not a bad thing per se, if we want something too much, it might create problems. The person who keeps wondering whether they will be good enough, last enough, or if every part of their body is a perfect size, might have trouble having enjoyable sex. For males, the most common reason for self-doubt is their penis size. Body image can play an essential role in our lives, and the more we dwell on it, the more problems it will cause.

As you can imagine already, ladies will often worry about the size of their breasts, bottom, or any other part of their body. This form of negative thoughts can only lead to further problems, and with general sexual dysfunction.

It is worth mentioning that some people may experience this problem due to some previous sexual experience. Some of their previous sexual partners might have given them reasons for self-doubt. It might also be a form of abuse or violence. Either way, the problem may have an impact on a person’s sexual activity.

Both men and women may experience anxiety if they focus on whether they will have an orgasm, if their intercourse will last for the optimal amount of time, or if their bodies are up to standards.

When we are stressed, our bodies create stress hormones like norepinephrine and epinephrine. While these hormones serve to help us deal with stress, they don’t have a place in a healthy sex life.

Overcoming Sexual Performance Anxiety

We already mentioned how some people worry about whether they will be up to standards. But the thing is that there is no international standard for sex. Each person is different, and there is a high chance that you are worrying for no reason. Yes, we understand how it sounds, and just saying that there are no reasons to worry will rarely eliminate the problem.

To successfully battle sexual anxiety, you will need to own your body. None of us is perfect, and the sooner you realize that, the better it will be for you. There is no secret that body image will impact your sexuality and your life, and you should find a way to cope with it. Instead of worrying whether your proportions and dimensions are good enough for ISO standards, you should think about why your partner chose you and why happy they are with you.

They love you for who you are with all your flaws. All of us watch porn, and sometimes, people wonder how they are nowhere close to performers in the industry. But that’s the thing — the porn industry chooses people who are above average to look good in the movie. You are not in porn, and you should embrace who you are.

Another excellent sex tip is to explore your sexuality and what you enjoy. That doesn’t have to mean that you don’t know which part goes where, but that you might be missing something instead. Stop worrying about what is “normal” and enjoy spending time with your partner. Share your fantasies and enjoy yourself. Be open with them and share everything. There is a high chance that they will reassure you and explain how there are no problems.


Many people experience sexual anxiety, and it can have a significant impact on their lives. But having such a problem doesn’t mean the end of the world, and through work, you will be able to overcome it.

Firstly, you should forget about what people consider normal and focus on enjoying yourself. One of the main problems with sexual performance is that people often see it as such. Sex is not a performance, there will be no judges, and you won’t go on the Olympics no matter how good you are.

Once you understand that and that many people have body image problems, you can start talking with your partner. You are in it together, and they are with you for a reason. What you might see as a fatal flaw, might be something they enjoy about you. So, be open with each other, talk, and go through it together.